No one wants to deal with drama, but it’s even worse when it rears its ugly head during wedding planning. How do you handle the drama when you already have enough on your plate? Whether your bridesmaids or family members are causing a rift, there are some steps you can take to help you get through it (and down the aisle).

Take a Deep Breath

First thing first, take a deep breath and stay calm. Remember: any drama caused by someone else has to do with them and not you. Your sole focus should continue to be planning your wedding! There are a lot of emotions and expectations swirling around this major life event, so it’s key that you remember what is truly important: that you end up married to your partner.

Communicate

Sit down to talk with whomever is causing the drama. You can include your soon-to-be spouse, too, if the troublemaker is on his side of the family. Find out why this person is upset in order to see if there’s anything you can do to help. If she’s upset with a specific person, plan to keep them away from each other (as much as possible). This means making sure they’re not seated near each other or taking photos together. If she’s upset with something you may have done, explain to her why you made the choice you did. These conversations won’t be easy, but they will be helpful. At the end of the day, your happiness is the most important. If the person causing the drama can’t understand that, she doesn’t need to be included. We know it doesn’t feel like it, but there is no rule saying you MUST include your cousin (who isn’t playing nice) just because she’s family. 

Bring in the big guns

Did your in-laws overtake the guest list? Were you forced to include someone in your wedding party because of tradition? Has the wedding budget become a battle between you and your parents? Call in some reinforcements. If you have a wedding planner, he or she can be the first line of defense. Event planners are famous for mediating family drama. She can make sure that you stay on budget, keep your in-laws happy and divert any unforeseen issues as they arise. If you don’t have a wedding planner, but you’re finding these types of tussles mounting, it may be wise to find the money in the wedding coffers to hire one. Plus, she should be able to help you strip down the budget (and potentially get you some deals with her vendors) that can make up the difference for her fee. Plus, you can’t put a price on peace. This leaves you free to focus on what your wedding day is truly about: marrying the love of your life.